Reprogramming Your Subconscious Mind to Help Clear Negative Beliefs and Patterns
Show Notes: Episode 14
Transcript
[Music intro]
The 8th Level Podcast is about being self-employed, entrepreneurship, and bootstrapping it. It’s also about unwinding and relaxing, and when we are not working in our business, to discover ways of connecting to our soul and self-care. My name is Lourdes, and I am the host of this podcast. Thanks for tuning in!
Lourdes: Today, my guest is Cornelius Wright. He likes to be called Corney. Corney is a certified hypno-psychotherapist, and a life balance coach. Corney uses a range of techniques, including clinical hypnosis, cognitive behavior therapy, and mindfulness, in order to tailor therapy to the unique needs of each client to achieve a positive outcome. As a life balance coach, Corney helps people gain back life balance in the areas of relaxation and calming, overcoming anxiety, stress and burnout, depression, relationships and crisis, trauma treatment, managing fears, phobias and negative thoughts, lack of motivation and drive, and personal confidence. He is based in the lovely country of Australia. He also has a private Facebook group called Mindful Hypnotherapy.
And so, Corney, welcome! It’s been so long since I’ve talked to you, how are you today?
Corney: I’m fine, thank you very much Lourdes! Great being here! Thanks!
Lourdes: So, a life coach. What is a balance life coach?
Corney: Well, y’know Lourdes, it doesn’t matter whether you’re a CEO wanting to improve a billion-dollar business, or a parent who just wants to improve the relationship with their children. Or even a person who wants to improve their health, their happiness, or their mental state. It’s basically any part of their lives, millions of people all over the world, all walks of life, benefiting from coaching at the moment or on a daily basis. So as a hypnotherapist, you basically can utilize this approach. To guide you through a difficult time, or to help you even just gain back life balance. In a mental health organization, or a mental health business, you actually become a coach to help people through those difficult times.
Lourdes: So, can you explain to us what is hypnotherapist, or what hypnotherapy is?
Corney: Well, Lourdes, the whole concept of hypnotherapy is where you guide a person in, during hypnosis to help them through a difficult process. So what usually happens is you would start off with a talk therapy process, a psychotherapy process, to determine what the challenge, the problem is that the person would like to discuss during hypnotherapy. And then you would engage or induce hypnotherapy with a person, and then you would basically provide benevolent suggestions to a person under hypnosis to basically help the person, to guide them to handle those kind of challenges that they suffer from on a daily basis. For example, if you think about anxiety, you would then be able to help the person during hypnosis to train them, to train their brain basically, to be able to cope with the anxiety and difficulties that they have during certain times, certain triggers, or certain situations. Sometimes people don’t necessarily deal with a situation in the same way in different circumstances. So it’s usually a specific trigger. As a psychotherapist and a hypnotherapist you determine what those triggers are, and then you do work on those triggers to actually coach or train the brain to identify those triggers, and then change your behavior in a different way. So that’s how you then talk to the brain, or to the subconscious mind. Because the subconscious mind is a very very powerful element in your life. 95% of your whole being is your subconscious mind, while only 5, sometimes even less than 5% makes up your conscious mind. So in hypnotherapy, basically talk to the subconscious mind. Think about it as an iceberg, the subconscious mind is the part under the water, while the conscious mind is only the little visible part above the water.
Lourdes: That is really interesting! So, it involves hypnosis. And so, with hypnosis, are you put to sleep? How does that work? Because, it seems like a lot of people think of hypnosis like when we watched TV in the old days, they put people to sleep and then the hypnotist would make that person do silly things without them being conscious of it. Is that what hypnosis is?
Corney: Not at all. In fact, that is definitely one of the misconceptions of hypnotherapy. And people very often are afraid of hypnosis, and you actually shouldn’t be. Because, people sometimes even ask me if you will make me bark like a dog, or do some silly things. And it needs to be recorded straight away that I am bound by a very strict code of ethics that prescribe how I treat my clients, with utmost respect. So therefore, to make a person bark like a dog under hypnosis is actually completely impossible. And here’s the reasons. Because hypnosis is not sleep, it’s basically just an altered state of consciousness, relaxation, inner focus. That’s actually what you’re having. So you will not be under my control, never be under my control, because you will never do something that is against your will or against your morals. And it’s also not a dangerous activity to engage in, because you will know exactly what was said afterwards. Sometimes your subconscious mind just programs or takes longer to mince the information that is given to the subconscious mind during hypnosis. But you will also not even be helpless, it’s a very natural extension of everyday awareness. And very often people even say that it will not work on me. It’s beneficial to all people going to it. It does not work instantly, because it all depends on the issue that’s being addressed and the session, or the desirability of the person. But it’s definitely not sleep, and so that when you wake up you don’t know what happened with you, and you don’t know what was said to you. You actually know. It’s just that theatre stage of awareness that you reach during hypnosis.
Lourdes: Good to know! I have a friend, she’s afraid of, get this, feathers. Y’know, feathers from birds? And she has such a big phobia, and when I asked her what happened, it was because when she was a child, her babysitter would take a feather and say “the feather’s gonna get you! The feather’s gonna get you!” And, I’ve tried to help her and kinda convince her to go into some type of hypnosis that would help her with this. And now that I know that you’re not actually asleep, and that she won’t have to touch a feather because she’s sort of awake, is that something that hypnotherapy can help her with?
Corney: Yes, definitely. Because, what I said in the beginning was that you need to be able to determine the triggers. What is that trigger that causes a person to react in a specific way? So you need to then identify that trigger, so in this case, there’s a historical aspect here. Because she was being made scared when she was a child. So now you need to get to that stage in terms of hypnotherapy, you can go to regression, what we call regression therapy. Take a person back to that age where they experienced that fear for the first time, and then you need to coach the mind, to coach the subconscious mind that that is actually ok. It’s not necessarily something that you need to worry about today, because your child behavior could be told under hypnosis that that was how you experienced it during childhood, but as an adult, how could you react if you are in the same circumstance now as an adult? So then, you tell your subconscious mind, so what’s the difference between your reaction and your reaction now as an adult? And that’s how they coach the mind under hypnosis to basically change or alter the behavior to a more benevolent behavior suggestion. And under hypnosis, you can deliver those benevolent suggestions to the subconscious mind so that you can alter the behavior of the person to help him or her.
Lourdes: Mhm! Ok, so is this something also if let’s say someone lacks confidence in their business, or somebody wants to move ahead in their business and there’s some type of setback, is that something that hypnotherapy can help too?
Corney: You know, the mind is a very strong part of your life. And yes, sometimes you can make yourself believe something that is not true, because it’s a perception. So under hypnosis, if you for example have a person that believes that he’s not successful, or is not confident, or he is stressed for everything, therefore I need, A B and C support. You can actually help that person under hypnosis to realize that you are great, you are good, with positive suggestions. And remember that if I tell you, your conscious mind, if you’re just sitting in front of me and I tell you that “you are good! You are great! You’re amazing!” Yes, you will hear it, but you won’t necessarily believe it because your conscious mind has its own thoughts. But if you tell the subconscious mind, that’s where the programming happens in a person’s mind. That’s where you’ll be able to get progressive and positive outcomes. Because you’re not talking to the conscious mind, you’re talking to the subconscious mind. The subconscious mind is the thinking mind, and you just need to make the subconscious mind realize that you don’t need to stress, you are great, you are good, you are confident, and you don’t need this other stress in your life. That’s where you start to make a change towards your behavior.
Lourdes: And again, let me remind all of our listeners that Corney is in Australia. And Corney, if somebody wanted to sign up with you, is it gonna be virtual, or do you just work with local people in the area?
Corney: No, I work on Zoom or any other platform that would be beneficial to the person. I work on Zoom, I’ve done that quite often. The only drawback for that probably, is that I don’t have that personal contact with a person. But as long as I can see your face and see your expressions during a hypnosis session I’m good. That is all that I’m – But yes, I have a Facebook page where people can reach me on. It’s at Wrighthypnotherapy, one word. And they can book meetings with me on my Facebook page, or just e-mail me at Corneywright.hypnotherapy@gmail.com.
Lourdes: Ok, so I was gonna ask you if there were setbacks, but not really! So, if somebody did book with you, do they have to do any type of preparation before they go on a Zoom meeting?
Corney: Yeah, they’d have to be a very quiet circumstance. So they need to be in a quiet room, sit in a comfortable chair with maybe an armrest, a little bit of a backrest where you can lean your head forwards, and have good sound. What I usually suggesting to clients is to put a headphone on so that you can block out other sounds. Although, I under hypnosis, will ask you to block out other sounds, but it’s always better to have that clear sound of my voice immediately coming to you into your subconscious mind. And they prefer not to work on just the computer sound, but you have some additional sound on your head, headphones, in your head, to make sure that there is no unclarity of what I’m discussing with you at that point. So a session usually takes about 45-50 minutes, and we usually start off with an initial discussion and so forth. Usually my first sessions are longer, because I need to get to the bottom of why the person is coming to me. And then we immediately start with hypnosis session, initial hypnosis session at first. But the only thing that is necessary, I’d need to able to see the face and the facial expressions.
Lourdes: I see. So, how do you qualify a client? Is that in the first session, or right before…?
Corney: Usually before the event coming in for the first session. If a person calls me or e-mails me, I would ask a couple of questions that would then help me to determine whether I am fit to answer this client. Because remember, not everybody – I don’t have all the information, I don’t have all the skills necessary. There are just certain things, y’know? Other people specialize in certain other mindful situations. So, I would then determine during that first initial call or initial discussion what the reason is for the visit, and whether I’m actually the best person to talk to. And then, if I’m not, I would refer. Remember that it’s not for me to only make money, or make to make business, therefore I will take every single client coming through my door. It’s not like that. It’s, eventually I need to look at what is the best solution for that person, and therefore I can’t do everything. I need to look at that person’s needs, maybe I’m not the right therapist for that person, for that personality, for that situation. So I would determine that in the first initial discussions, and then during the first session, I would also engage a little bit more about that. And then I would also discuss with the client the way forward. How many sessions are we going to have together? And this is the plan, because I usually do that through the CBT process so that I can tell the client, “this is where we are, this is where we want to be.” So that the client also knows what is the way forward. Because eventually, it’s the clients issue that we’re dealing with, not mine. So he or she needs to approve that process, the steps that we are going to take to get towards the end.
Lourdes: Listening to your answers, I came up with two questions. One, what is CBT? And two, if after the first session you find out that this is not the person that you can help, how do you tell that client?
Corney: Well, first question, CBT, it’s Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. And basically, the CBT helps the client to identify their triggers and to understand the historical reasons associated with those triggers, and then to pintpoint their emotions and their feelings, and to develop replacement thoughts that would become part of their decision making. Basically, benevolent decision making so that you don’t no longer stay with your negative thoughts, you change that to more positive thoughts. So that is what CBT is, and that’s the method that I use. It’s used actually all over the world, and it’s been used very effectively in hypnotherapy and psychotherapy, and many other psychological practices.
And how I would tell a client… We don’t need to lie to clients. They have come to you for help. So to have an open and a frank discussion in a very empathetic way with a client on the way forward will benefit them, not harm them. So if I’m not the right therapist for that specific situation, I’ll be open with the person and say to them that I think it’s better for your own health and your own situation, let’s find you someone else that would be more beneficial to your situation. And I’ve never had an issue where people would say “Oh, I hate you now.” “I don’t like you now.” And y’know, be unhappy about that. No, people understand that you go to a different doctor for a different illness, and it’s the same in mental illness. You go to a different mental health therapist for different things. Some people specialize in non-smoking or anti-smoking, or anxiety or depression. It’s just kind of how it is. There are certain things that you can do and you can’t do. Or want to do and don’t want to do.
Lourdes: Makes sense. Who is your ideal client?
Corney: Well, a person who would like to make a change in their life. A person that, y’know that really wants to change. A person that wants to come to you and just want to see how it is going. They need to make the change in their own heads first. That level of acceptance. Because it’s only when you want to change, that is only when you are able to be treated in a specific… Towards a positive outcome. A person that comes to you and is still unsure whether they want to quit smoking or they want to leave the anxiety behind, no. They need to make a decision before they come to you, “I want to make this change.” Because it is ultimately not me that is going to make them change, it’s them who’s going to make them change themselves. So I want a positive client who’s willing to take on this challenge with me, and make that change in their life.
Lourdes: And the other question is, as a business owner, we experience some levels of stress, and we need to remember how to manage it. So for self-care for example, can you tell us an effective way to reprogram your mind by using self-care or self-hypnosis?
Corney: Lourdes, this is actually not only an effective way for business owners, but I even suggest that for my clients. Because, have you ever heard of the saying “the sky is not the limit, the mind is?” And, that is exactly what it is. Sometimes you find that your mind is actually the biggest enemy that you have in life. Now, I have developed a 5 step program that every person can do every night before they go to bed. And when you go to bed, you must remember that the subconscious mind – that the conscious mind switches off, but the subconscious mind stays awake 24/7 365 days a year. And the subconscious mind is responsible for, as I said before, 95-99% of everything that we do every single day. And almost every choice you make every day is made by not your conscious mind, but by your subconscious program. So it is 100x more powerful than the conscious mind, and it’s also a lot more difficult to change, it is a habit mind. And many people focus on training the conscious mind, but they forget that they equally need to train the subconscious mind. And so, there are 5 secrets basically of repetition that you can set yourself up for success every single night by simply programming your subconscious mind.
And the first step, before going to bed, is to plan your next day. Plan your tomorrow before you go to bed. What time you should get up, what is the important task for the day, but just say to yourself “this is my most important things that I’m going to do today.” You basically telling your subconscious mind in that process “Listen on, we’re going to do this tomorrow.”
The second thing is review your goals, every single night. Remember that the subconscious mind works with repetition. And if you want to reprogram your mind for success, you have to do it over and over and over again. You basically just learn that with repetition. You cannot set the goal, read it once, and expect it to happen. You need to repeat it for yourself, and your subconscious mind needs to get used to it. And while you sleep, your subconscious mind will actually help you achieve those goals.
And the third thing is the practice gratitude. And it’s very important to show gratitude before going to bed. Not only to yourself, but to your friends, your family, even a text to a family member. Just express gratitude, even if you just go on your knees and say thank you for the health and the wealth and the well-being that you have. To thank your spouse for everything else that they have in your life. Just show that gratitude. Basically you’re just now starting to reprogram your mind to think in abundance. And not just think small, to think positively.
The fourth thing is to ask your conscious mind for the answers. Never go to bed without a request to your subconscious mind. Thomas Edison even said that, never go to sleep without a request to your subconscious. Because, instead of going to bed worrying, thinking about a problem you struggle with, or how life is not basically turning out the way that you planned, instead you ask your subconscious mind to get an answer for yourself. And while you’re sleeping, your subconscious mind is actually finding a way. Have you ever woken up the following day, and you suddenly have an answer when you stand in the shower, and you suddenly get a response or an answer to a problem that you’ve been struggling with? It was your subconscious mind that was working in the background.
And lastly, my fifth step, is hypnotherapy. Because the subconscious mind operates out of programs, and if you want to change the program you have to speak in the language of the subconscious mind. And that is done through hypnotherapy. By taking your brainwaves down to a child-like super-learning state of beta brain waves, you are actually taking the types of that run the programs of your subconscious mind. And this is what I’ve taught some of my clients, how to program. Just follow these simple steps every night, and it will become a habit.
Lourdes: That is a gem and a half for you to share that information with us! Thank you so much!
Corney: Sure.
Lourdes: I know you work a lot, and you have client work. I wonder, how do you find time to relax and what do you do when you’re not working?
Corney: I watch movies with my wife. We started a challenge for ourselves, we would watch all the movies with more than one sequel. So we’re doing quite well with that. So we watch movies, but I’d still like to spend time with my family outdoors or indoors and just relax. And then I cook. I love to cook, I love to make good food. So once a year, I organize or I host what I call a candlelight supper for a couple of friends. And then I go all-out with a seven course meal, that’s what I do.
Lourdes: You know, I was gonna ask you a funny or weird question, and I already had that picked out. And as you know, it’s a surprise question. But now I have to change it because you just told me you love to cook. [Laughter] So here it goes, here’s my funny and weird question. What was your biggest disaster in the kitchen?
Corney: Oh my goodness, I once tried to cook salmon! You know salmon is a very hard thing to make. And, it was terrible, it was horrible. And it was for people who I really wanted to entertain that evening. And it was a total, total disaster. Even my son up to today is talking about that fish, and he doesn’t eat salmon, and he doesn’t even eat salmon since that day. So that was my biggest disaster. I’ve had many, in fact, but that one stands out.
Lourdes: So, can you elaborate on that salmon please? I want to know! [Laughter]
Corney: I just overcooked it! I just completely overcooked it, it fell apart, it was dry, it was not pink! It was like, woah. It was burned and overcooked and it was just terrible! Just unedible!
Lourdes: Oh man! That must’ve been pretty bad!
Corney: It was so embarrassing.
Lourdes: And for company too.
Corney: Yeah, exactly! It was my main course.
Lourdes: What’d you afterwards?
Corney: Well, I just apologized. Sorry, eat more salad, eat more starch, y’know, leave the fish.
Lourdes: [Laughter] That’s funny. Anyways, we’re coming to the end of our interview, and can you remind us again how to contact you and how to connect with you?
Corney: Yes, Facebook. My Facebook page is Wrighthypnotherapy, one word. And clients can also e-mail me on corneywright.hypnotherapy@gmail.com.
Lourdes: Perfect, thank you so much for having this wonderful discussion about hypnotherapy, CBT, and being a life balance coach, I’ve learned so much!
Corney: Thank you Lourdes, thank you for having me! And it was lovely speaking to you today!
Lourdes: Yes, you too, bye now!
Wow, I had no idea that we can improve ourselves by reprogramming our subconscious mind, confidence issues come back, any type of baggage from the past is improved, that is just amazing! And it is such an honor to be able to interview these wonderful guests and learn from them. Alright, and for next Wednesday’s episode, I’m gonna talk about etiquettes for virtual assistants and freelancers. Thanks again, and join us next week!
[Music outro]
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Resources
Corney’s E-mail – Corneywright.hypnotherapy@gmail.com
Corney’s Facebook Page – Wrighthypnotherapy or click here: https://www.facebook.com/wrighthypnotherapy/
Corney Facebook: https://facebook.com/
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